Learn to Write with Tony Holkham

If you've already written something, why not let me review it for you, at very reasonable cost?

ONLY £2 a lesson?
This is an open-ended writing course, one simple lesson at a time, for anyone who wants to learn how to write. I am shocked at the prices big business charges for writing tuition when hopeful writers have no idea whether they really want to write, or even can write (many people are not suited to it).

It makes sense, therefore, to offer a long series of short lessons. It doesn't hurt your pocket, is easy on your brain, and allows you to opt out at any time without wasting your money.

In addition, since the course is by email, there are no overheads such as printing, postage or phone calls, so the costs can be kept to a minimum. Besides which, writing has been my life, and it's fun to help others achieve the satisfaction it has given me over many years.

The course covers the many practical aspects of writing: fiction, non-fiction, drama, verse, business, marketing or technical writing and reports, letters, emails, thesis, CV or website content. It is for individual tuition; for companies or other organisations wishing to improve their business writing generally, click here .

I encourage you to write from the very beginning. I will be there every step of the way to guide you to a full understanding of what you need to do to write well and accomplish your aims for doing it. If you want to see your work published, I can help with that, too.

If you'd like to see my credentials as a writing tutor, then click here.

Remember, you pay only for what you do; for each £2 lesson you get advice and feedback on your writing skills as they develop. You are not committed to any number of lessons, but you should complete the exercises at the end of each lesson before going on to the next.

LESSON 1 IS FREE (see below) - this is because I don't want to waste your time - or mine - and learning to write is not for everyone. Lesson 1 is a general introduction to writing for beginners - subsequent lessons are more structured and tailored to what you want to write and what you want your writing to achieve for you.

Before you start, however, you need to answer three simple questions.

QUESTION 1. Why do you want to write?

Here are some reasons people give:

[a] Money - a single best-seller will set you up for life. Unfortunately, publishing a best-seller has probably similar odds to winning the lottery. It doesn't mean you shouldn't buy a ticket, but don't hold your breath. On the other hand, there is no reason why you shouldn't supplement your income by writing if you develop the right skills, and even go on to become a full-time writer with luck and perseverance.

[b] Fame - becoming a household name with the associated wealth and improved circumstances is a double-edged sword as you can see by reading the news. Some successful writers handle it well. However, there's a long way to go before you get to worry about that.

[c] Influence - passing on your wisdom or insight to others and becoming someone people look to for advice, stimulation or entertainment is a worthy reason for taking up writing. If you have a particular expertise, it will find a following - you just have to work at it.

[d] Education - learning a new skill can be great fun and highly rewarding. Learning to write is a good way to keep your mind active, too.

[e] Legacy - telling your descendants about the present and at the same time hopefully setting up a steady income for them is an equally satisfying reason for taking up writing.

What's your reason for wanting to write?

QUESTION 2. Are you prepared to commit time to it?

How much time? My view is that you should aim for about an hour a day. Little and often is the key rather than sustained periods in which you may become tired and jaded. For all the years I have been writing I have stuck to this rule, and whenever I have deviated from it I have found it less productive.

QUESTION 3. Can you take criticism?

Prospective publishers may give an opinion about your work (or worse still, not offer any opinion) and so will I. But my criticism will always be constructive and helpful.

When you have considered these three questions and you still want to learn to write, then let's begin today. If you're still not sure, then re-read the above, and give it some more thought. Contact me if you have any questions.

IF YOU ARE UNDECIDED OR YOU HAVE ALREADY DONE SOME WRITING...
...why not send me some of your work so I can give you a brief professional view of your writing?

Contact me to find out how - I charge only 99p per page.
There is no charge if you buy at least Lesson 2 and have completed Lesson 1.

I ALSO ADVISE ON
CVs, theses, course work, job applications, proof reading, letters, business literature
(labels, product information, marketing materials, technical data sheets and manuals, etc). Contact me.

DO YOU KNOW SOMEONE WHO HAS DIFFICULTY READING OR WRITING?
I can help them over this difficulty.
Contact me.

LESSON 1

First thoughts on learning to write

INTRODUCTION

You may be like many people, and would like to write, but don't. You may not have the confidence; you may not feel you have the command of the language; you may not know what you want to write about; you may know nothing about publishing; you may not have the time for any of these things.

There isn't much I can do about the last, but this course, unlike many other hugely more expensive courses, does help with the other aspects in some detail.

Let me point out straight away that there are no guarantees in this business, but I can make it more likely that you will get work published by improving your writing and telling you how to get potential publishers to read your work.

CONFIDENCE. Nothing will give you more confidence than trying. You don't have to write a novel; you don't even have to try to get the work published - much of my work that you will see on this site has never been published or even offered for publication. I write for my own pleasure, and sometimes send them to friends for their pleasure (I hope!). Just completing a small work will give you the confidence to continue.

In order to write, one thing you must do is READ. Not to give you ideas to copy (though you can copy style, if you want to), but to give you an idea of what makes a good story, poem or essay (article). Don't just read modern literature; select from all eras and all genres and decide for yourself what is good language - you may be surprised, for example, to know that Ian Fleming's writing is amongst the best. Try out new words in your conversation and writing, and look up any words you aren't familiar with to improve your vocabulary. Read my work (fiction and/or non-fiction) on this website (particularly pieces that have been published).

Another thing you must do is WRITE. That may seem obvious, but the more you write, the better writer you will become. Keep a notebook with you at all times - even by the bed - and note down anything which comes into your mind: a reaction, something someone said, an idea, a title - anything which if you did not write it down you might forget in the next minute. I call them jots, and I have filled 23 jot pads over the past 35 years. It will be helpful, when you start, to index them and transfer them to your word processor as soon as possible (I didn't, and it's going to take me a long time to transfer mine - if I live long enough, that is!). Re-read your jots from time to time, but don't get side-tracked by organisation - Robert Townsend (Up the Organisation - a brilliant book) said what a wonderful illusion of progress is reorganisation. The important thing is to create, not shuffle.

In SPEECH, look for alternatives to such overused words as "nice" and don't forget to listen to what others say and how they say it. Dialogue is one of the hardest aspects of writing to do well even though we talk to each other every day.

PRACTICE. It has been said that no one learned to cook by watching cookery programmes. Similarly, you will not improve your driving without practising driving. The same goes for any skill, so practise writing, any spare moment you have. This is as important as reading. Write letters or emails, too - that's excellent practice (read mine to see what sort of ways you can write and what you can write about - see Non-fiction). You probably won't get paid, but if you write well and to the point, you may have letters published by your local paper, which is always a boost to your confidence.

WHAT SHOULD YOU WRITE ABOUT?

Any writing tutor will tell you: write about what you know. That's good advice; always follow it (though it has to be said some successful writers don't). When I had my first story accepted by the Evening News in 1977, a short thriller about a fairground, I knew nothing about fairgrounds. The Evening News were kind enough to add a few words of authenticity, and I have been grateful to them ever since. You will see this story if you click on Fiction above and read Don't Get Me Wrong. You will also see the text they published. I can reproduce it because they were also kind enough to copyright the story as mine, even after they had improved it. I learned a valuable lesson. So if you haven't been in a jungle, don't write about it (the exception here is in fantasy or science fiction, about which more in a later lesson).

GETTING DOWN TO IT

There is no substitute for doing. If you have a project in mind, think of it as building a house. You will need plans (a structure for your work so you have a goal to work towards). You will need materials (ideas, facts, arguments and, in fiction, characters, dialogue and events). You will need labour (your time and effort). All this takes self-discipline.

DON'T GIVE UP THE DAY JOB. Sorry to introduce this negative note, but don't assume that if you have sold a short story or article you can make a living at it. The market is extremely fickle, and can afford to be, being flooded with the work of people who think they can write for a living simply because they have Microsoft Word on their computers and an e-mail facility. Acquiring a box of carpentry tools does not make you a carpenter.

However, as soon as you deliberately type meaningful words on to the screen or write them in your jot pad, you are already a writer. Not yet successful, nor yet accomplished, but a writer nevertheless. There's a lot of work to be done, but this is your first step.

TIME. I have only one thing to say about this - if you really want to do something you will find the time to do it. You can quote me on that.

WRITING DEVICES

There are many ways in which you can make your writing stand out from the crowd. Here are some.

HUMOUR
"Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana." (Groucho Marx)
As in the above quote, humour is often in the unexpected. Humour is vital. Smiling is good for you; laughing even better. It's always worth considering humour when writing, even when the underlying message is serious. It can take the edge off a sensitive situation, and make readers remember what they have read. Even a serious book can contain humour, such as that in my eminently sensible business book "Label Writing & Planning" (see For sale). My consumer help book, "Don't Take It Lying Down" (see For sale) delivers many hollow laughs at the nonsense consumers are expected to swallow whole these days. With humour, messages stay in the mind for longer. Introduce humour into your writing, whether in business or private life.

SEX, VIOLENCE AND OTHER ADULT THEMES
There's always debate about the role of adult themes in literature. In my view, they are part of life, so should be part of literature, but it's not necessary to go into great detail. Use this yardstick - would you be happy to leave your work on the table for a child or a close relative to pick up and read? Remember that readers have imagination; let them use it - they will enjoy your work more than if you spelled out every action and event.

PLAIN ENGLISH

"Most people confuse complexity with profundity, and opaque prose with deep meaning. But the greatest ideas have been expressed clearly" (Leo Rosten)

I agree. People speak using plain English. So why do we write:

too many words
too many long words
too-long sentences
too much jargon

as if we're trying to win a prize in a competition?

Be brief and to the point. It carries more weight and sincerity. It is easier to understand. It is less likely to be ignored. It avoids confusion. People like to read, not wade. You want to entertain, not torture.

ABOUT PUBLISHING

"At every crossway on the road to the future, each progressive spirit is opposed by a thousand men appointed to guard the past". (Maeterlinck)

Be bold. If you have an idea, GO FOR IT. All very well, you say, having heard (or discovered) that major publishers turn down hundreds of manuscripts every week. But that doesn't mean the rejected works are no good. Far from it. It simply means the timing, the subject or the presentation isn't right. Or it doesn't have a huge market.

There are ways round this. One important way is to get hold of a copy of the Writers' and Artists' Year Book (from a bookshop or library) and read the advice in there. You'll need to be selective, and I can help there.

PUBLISHING - frequently asked questions

How do I know if my idea is worth writing up into a book (or whether my book is worth publishing)?
If you have written a book, ask an agent (see below), a publisher or me for an opinion. You will probably have to pay for it, but you will get a constructive criticism. You can then feel more confident in approaching other publishers once you have worked on it some more.

Will I need an agent?
If you can get an agent, great, but your work has to be special, and the majority of agents will only take on writers who have already had a book published; how ironic is that? It's usually a lot less grief to approach publishers direct, which you can do nowadays by e-mail as well as by letter. Always ask first if they will read your work before sending it.

What if my work is rejected?
Remember that it's the work that has been rejected, not you. Try again. Rewrite it, if necessary. The most important thing is to submit a lively, interesting and succinct synopsis which will make a publisher at least want to read your work and perhaps offer some constructive criticism. Don't be put off by rejections - if your work is good, eventually it will be published (because publishers will see money in it for them). Think positive!

How much will I get paid, and when?
For books, royalties on publication are agreed by negotiation, and it will depend on how much money the publisher thinks they will make on your book. Around 10% of net sale proceeds is usual. Frequency of payment varies from quarterly to annually, with most publishers. Sometimes there's a once-only royalty. Remember you must have a contract, and if you are in any doubt about the contents of a contract, consult a solicitor.

For articles, short stories and other works there will usually be a one-off payment. If you are lucky you may be asked to write more. The regular writing I do for the RNLI was originally on the strength of a very short piece about my stay at the Lifeboat College in Poole. There is an infinite number of ways you can find an outlet for your work.

Should I pay to have my book published?
That depends on how badly you want it published, how quickly, and how good it is. There are circumstances in which you might pay for the book to be published, such as one for a limited private circulation (a family history, for example). But if the book is good enough, you should NOT have to pay for it. A publisher will. If you do decide to pay for it yourself, for whatever reason, then keep control of it. You'd be surprised how many people get stung by the aptly-named 'vanity' publishing. There may be a few reputable ones around (I don't know any), but there are many others who will publish your book regardless of its quality, charge you for it, then not bother to market or even print it. In the 1960s I (in common with many other writers) got stung for over a hundred pounds (a lot of money then). The company took our money and then went bust. The director's wife turned up to the creditors' meeting in a fur coat and a new Jaguar. Needless to say we writers got nothing. You don't have to experience this - take my word for it. You don't get ought for nought, as they say in Yorkshire.

IF YOU HAVE ANY OTHER QUESTIONS, I'LL BE HAPPY TO TRY TO ANSWER THEM. CONTACT ME.
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LESSON 1 - EXERCISES

For all exercises, please note: put your name, the number of the lesson and the number of the exercise in the heading of your email to me.

EXERCISE 1(a)

Write about 500 words (you will need to learn to write to length - this will be covered in more detail in a subsequent lesson) on any subject you like, in any genre, and email it to me (in the body of the email or as an attached Word document).

EXERCISE 1(b)

Explain in no more than 200 words why you wrote what you did for Exercise 1a and send it to me in the same way.

END OF LESSON 1

To help you further, have a look at the following:

MY WRITING

If you want to read some of my work, then click on fiction, non-fiction or verse.

RECOMMENDED READING

"VOICES FROM THE SEA" by Ruth Cocks. Published 2004 (200+ pages)
Selsey's (Sussex) coastguards, divers, fishermen, lifeboat crew members and other sea stories.
Foreword by Sir Patrick Moore
A fascinating historical document, no matter where you live. For a copy or more info, contact Ruth Cocks (cocks@quista.net) or visit www.voicesfromthesea.net to find out more.

What am I reading?
I haven't started a book for a couple of weeks as I needed to catch up with Which?, The Lifeboat, This England and New Scientist, all of which have been accumulating in the magazine rack, and I have also been busy writing for a local magazine and the RNLI's Compass magazine for the south-east of England. However, I do want to tackle some classics next, such as Austen, Bronte or Trollope, of which I have read very little. I'm also (still!) working my way through Gems of English Poetry, a book my grandmother always kept by her bedside.

You may not have known this, but I am also a dealer in books - look for books I have for sale.

My list of top ten books (in no particular order) which hasn't changed for several years:

Tarka the Otter(Henry Williamson) - the life of an otter in Devon; dramatic and beautifully written.
Up the Organisation (Robert Townsend) - what everyone in business absolutely needs to know; practical and funny.
The C.O. Jones Compendium of Practical Jokes (Richard Boston) - practical jokes down the ages; wonderful.
Gateway (Frederick Pohl) - in my view one of the best ever SF novels; an alien's gateway is discovered, but leading where? (Not for children)
Science Fiction Hall of Fame Vol. I - the greatest SF short stories from the early days; Asimov, Campbell and others.
Songmaster (Orson Scott Card) - wow! Mind-blowing story of childhood, love and spiritual depth.
Dawn of D-Day (David Howarth) - the 'prequel' (hate the word!) to the greatest invasion of all time
The Life and Times of Horatio Hornblower (C Northcote Parkinson) - the comprehensive 'biography' of the famous fictional character.
A Man of Singular Virtue (William Roper) - the Life of Sir Thomas More, by his son-in-law.
The Wind in the Willows (Kenneth Grahame) - dramatic, uplifting, endearing, and not just for children.

Many wonderful books do not quite make the list - fiction, science fiction, non-fiction, drama and verse. The ones listed above are those I re-read the most often, and that probably have given me the most pleasure.

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